The Mexican Festival comes to Sweet Valley.

Yay, because one West Side Story rip-off is not enough.

Here’s what you need to know about Manuel:

  • He’s Mexican, and usually hangs out with the other Mexican students in school. What there’s other Mexican students? Oh yea, there is. One other person.
  • He’s totally in love with Sandra, even though she seems to have zero personality.
  • He and his family are totally stoked for the upcoming Sweet Valley Mexican festival. Yes, you heard me right.
  • He’s pissed that Sandra won’t tell her parents about him and feels totally disrespected.
  • He actually seems like a decent guy.

Here’s what you need to know about Sandra:

  • She has no personality and is supposedly a cheerleader and in Phi Beta Pi.
  • Her parents are country-club membership carrying, old-fashioned racists. In fact, her father wrote a letter to the Sweet Valley News”complaining how minorities and immigrants are ruining the community”. I was thinking about trying to recreate that letter, but maybe that would be going too far?They are also the kind of racists that cover it up with “we just want what’s best for you Sandra, and you will have a hard life if you associate with ‘that sort of crowd'”.
  • She hides her relationship with Manuel from her parents and makes everyone cover for her. Manuel feels disrespected but she ignores that. Good job Sandy.
  • She appears to be 37 years old.

How does Liz get involved?

Well, it wouldn’t be an SVH book if Liz didn’t get to stick her nose in people’s business and tell adults how to raise their children.

Suddenly, she is Sandy’s best friend. Considering Sandra is a cheerleader, why wouldn’t she go to Jessica? Anyway, Liz is about to print something in Eyes and Ears about Sandy and Manny and Sandra asks her not to print it. Liz gets all huffy and spouts off about journalistuic integrity and takes this opportunity to coach Sandra on the right thing to do. And then wonders to herself that she’s soooo lucky that she has such a tolerant and accepting family. I’ll let you do the vomit noise.

Then, to further assert her whiteness, Sandra asks Manuel out on her sailboat, but she needs to tell her parents that she’s taking a friend. So that friend gets to be Liz. Miracle of all miracles. the engine catches on fire and Manuel saves both Liz and and Sandra, but Sandra tells him to scram when the police come and to let Liz take the credit for saving them. Sandra’s a real peach.

Lix secretly loves being the hero, but still urges Sandra to tell her parents, especially after bystanders report seeing a MEXICAN BOY tampering with the motor. So now the police suspect Manuel! And when they bring him in for questioning, Sandra pretends that she doesn’t know him. Why in the fuck does he not dump Sandra?

Finally, her parents found out that Manuel was the one who saved her, they totally absolve their racism, decide to go to the Mexican Festival with Manuel and his family, and invite him to the dance at the country club. Yea, because that’s all he ever wanted, so be accepted into the snooty white crowd. Of course every person of color in Sweet Valley’s ultimate dream is to be treated just like the white people! Happy Ending!