Not a Girl, Not Yet a Woman

In today’s installment, the part of DeeDee will be played by Amanda Bearse. The part of Bill will be played by Bill’s chest. I wish he looked a bit more Zabka-esque on this cover. (Also, this never gets old.)

DeeDee used to be interesting because she used to take drafting classes at theCivic Center. Hold on to that nugget because it will be conveneient later. After she got together with mega-hunk Bill Chase, she is all about him, and talks nothing of him, and gets all jealous and crazy about him. And can’t even wipe her own ass without checking with Bill first. Ew.Bill, even though he is a nice guy (he’s such a nice guy) he is getting sick of it. He dumps DeeDee (say that 10 times fast) and she practically throws herself off Miller’s point. By the way, I’m ready to push her. Hey ghostwriter, you should portray DeeDee as needy, not mentally challenged.

Liz to the rescue! Meanwhile, there’s a talent show coming up, and Mr. Collins has APPOINTED Liz as the coordinator. She wants DeeDee to design the sets (is Olivia Davidson busy?) but DeeDee can’t do it by herself because suddenly she is a three-year old and she can’t even wipe her ass by herself without freaking out. Liz hatches a plan with DeeDee’s best friend, Patty Gilbert (Patty’s black, by the way) where Liz will pretend to be sick for the week and make DeeDee take over to prove that she can take charge and handle herself on her own. Wow Liz, great plan! And you can get out of doing the work, AND be the hero in the end!!

Uh, do I need to tell you the end? DeeDee takes over, gains confidence, and Bill gets her back. But, they are going to take is slow because DeeDee needs to be her own person! She’s a modern, independent woman! And she’s fascinating because she takes drafting classes at the civic center!

Oh yea, that. Alice and Ned take a trip to Mexico for the week and leave the twins at home. Of course, Jessica throws a party. Lila has her college boyfriend put up a flyer in the frat house about it. Chyah, because frat guys are just looking for a suburban teeanger’s house to party at. Only if you are in a John Hughes movie, I guess. The last thing Alice says before she leaves is, “whatever you do, don’t ruin the sketches left on my drafting table, it’s the only copy”! Dun dun dun…..good use of foreshadowing there. Someone spills beer on it during the party, and DeeDee, since OH MY GOD SHE’S BEEN TAKING DRAFTING CLASSES AT THE CIVIC CENTER came and fixed it. Her sense of enabling the Wakefields…oh I mean taking charge gives her her confidence back!

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22 thoughts on “Not a Girl, Not Yet a Woman

  1. Neek1981 says:

    Damn, what a jacked up cover! When I first looked at this, I thought they were both wearing terry cloth bathrobes. Are they?
    Good recap, but this one sounds dull as dishwateter. I’ve heard the title before, but I don’t think I’ve ever read it, and for some reason I thought Too Much in Love seemed like a title of a Liz/Todd or a Liz/Jeffrey book. I think someone mentioned before how often the word ‘love’ is mentioned in the titles of these books(ex. Double Love, Are We in Love?, When Love Dies….). You’d think they’d be romantic, but they never are.

    • Belle says:

      Exactly, and of course, most of us who read these books grew up believing that these characters’ convoluted shallow relationships were what real ‘love’ was supposed to be like.

  2. Magpie says:

    Is Bill wearing a hoody, two decades before hoodies became so popular? What is up with his face? He looks all shiny and plastic. DeeDee is scaring me a little, she’s got the look of Alex Forrest about her.

    Ihatewheat, congrats for actually managing to finish this book AND come up with a recap that’s still funny. It sounds like the ghostwriter wasn’t even trying with this one. And I’m sure Alice would be really happy to learn that somebody twenty years her junior can do her job better than she can!

  3. Rio says:

    What the hell is that pink thing on DeeDee’s sleeve? I can’t tell if it’s a big wad of gum or somebody’s tongue. Also, Bill looks like his entire body, including the hair, has been shellacked.

  4. Jen S says:

    Hey, Alice! There’s this fantastic new invention designed to keep valuable, one-copy-only paperwork safe–it’s called a FOLDER!

    Jeez, woman, you’re so paranoid about the damn plans, PUT THE DAMN THINGS SOMEWHERE SAFE.

    • Neek1981 says:

      I know, right? You’d think she’d invest in a filing cabinet or something seeing as how Jess has her own credit card and they have that Spanish-style house…

      • Becca says:

        Or maybe she could’ve made a copy before they left if the plans were so important? How does Alice get hired to do anything? Are Spanish-style tiled kitchens that popular in Sweet Valley?

    • Whallie says:

      HA HA HA! Totally, and I’m sure those sketches were Spanish style too, resembling the Wakefield home. Alice is a one-trick pony, kinda like Mike Brady and his astroturf.

  5. MT says:

    Ugh, I just read this one recently and thought it was crap. Even the party scenes were ridiculous, with Winston doing magic tricks in the corner. Lila rolling around on the couch with her boyfriend was somewhat amusing though. And yeah, DeeDee’s eyes are all weird on the cover of this one.

  6. Whallie says:

    DeeDee should have taken lessons from Jessica and go make out with like 10 dudes at the party, or better yet, steal Patty’s boyfriend. That would have shown Bill and made him come back.

  7. Vanessa Saxton says:

    I read this one but I don’t remember the party scene. I guess I skimmed over it. I am sure I would have remembered beer in Sweet Valley at a place other than Kelly’s or the Shady Lady. Doesn’t DeeDee make an appearance designing tee shirts with puffy paint and Jessica tries to steal them or something? Or was this another generic character?

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