I don’t really need to remind you all to vote today, because if you are on Facebook, you’ve already received about a thousand annoying applications asking you to do so. Also to remind you that The Dairi Burger does not endorse a particulaur candidate, do what you want and don’t be afraid to vote for third party candidates! Okay, now I’m getting a bit political. Anyhow, the Sweet Valley City Council race is pretty heated this year, and there’s been a record number of candidates! Here are some of the platforms that are causing a stir.
- Mr. Bacon want to bring back segregation
- Mr. Collins wantw more funding for afterschool program and to lower the age of consent
- Mrs. Wakefield wants to give more funding to police to curb kidnapping, psychotic murderers and cults in Sweet Valley
- Ms. Whitman wants more funding for sex ed in the schools
- Mr. Patman wants to lower taxes on the rich
- Ms. McKay wants to legalize same-sex marriage
- Mr. Martin is running for re-election as the town drunk
And, to top it off, Liz is offering any candidates her services as a speechwriter. And Jessica has offered up the cheerleaders to do a car wash fundraiser to help her father’s campaign! Lila will fund any campaign that will promise her a $150,000 wardrobe allowance.