Excepts from Edward Cullen’s Twitter feed through Chapters 13 and 14
sparkleevamp67: (9:08) brb going to take Bella to the middle of nowhere
sparkleevamp67: (12:08) activate sparkle…. she totally digs it
sparkleevamp67: (1:09) god! I just want to rip out her internal organs. she needs to keep me from wanting to kill her. she’s such a tease.
sparkleevamp67: (1:47) told her she is asking for it, wearing that short skirt that shows off those…veins and arteries
sparkleevamp67: (2:30) omg! she just asked me if we can have teh sex! Tee hee
sparkleevamp67: (2:51) duh, doesn’t she know jasper and alice can only do it because their married? for a hundred years? if we do it she will die. just like stds.
sparkleevamp67: (4:05)ok time to go home
sparkleevamp67:(4:14) I just took her for a ride on my back, tauntaun style. chix dig that.
sparkleevamp67: (4:47)we kissed and she was horrible. i’ll have to make up an excuse as to why we can’t do that again
sparkleevamp67: (7:15) took me back to her house where I can maybe get to 2nd base
sparkleevamp67: (8:37)damn! charlie came home. i’ll have to settle for just watching her sleep again.
sparkleevamp67: (9:12) woops! I accidentally told her I do that every night. but she digs it. this chick is crazy
sparkleevamp67: (9:14) ok she just put on her jammies. Lost my boner a little bit.
sparkleevamp67: (10:15) this chick is great. all she wants to do is talk about me
What is it about Edward that reminds me so much of Jessica Wakefield?
I totally get a Bruce Patman vibe from him.
Dang it, you’re right. I was just trying to figure out which twin he has more in common with.
And Bella is a total Enid.
I was thinking Lynne Henry, pre-makeover.
hahaha…that is the best twitter feed. Much better than the book!
Yay for the tauntaun reference!
*snicker* Egads, this book (series) is going to drive me up the wall in about 5 seconds. What’s even worse is going on Facebook and seeing how many people OBSESS about this stupid movie. Argh!
Great Twitter feed though. Cracks my butt up.
told her she is asking for it, wearing that short skirt that shows off those…veins and arteries
*dies*
HAHAHAHAHA…”lost my boner a little bit”…oh,edward, you’d have to have at least a modicum of testosterone in the first place!
Watched the movie and got massively glared at by the ridiculous fangirlies for snorting at the excruciating dialogue…good fun!!
forcoxfegirl on December 11, 2010 Did I hear him correctly? He 2.5 hours of cardio a day? That sounds like a lot.
*this chick is great. all she wants to do is talk about me*
LOLOLOLOL!
Why does this remind me of every boy I went to high school with? And they weren’t all that–didn’t even sparkle or give tauntaun rides!
“ok she just put on her jammies. Lost my boner a little bit.” HA! Really, Bella, the guy’s spending the night for the first time (that you know of, the creep), put on some pants without holes in them.
The movie was HORRID!
I got my neice a deluxe paperback of “A Wrinkle in Time”…my big brother got her the Twilight series.
Hmmm…will Meg Murry beat Bella Swann’s a$$?
Enid Rollins,
That’s a an awesome gift. Meg Murray is one of the best girl icons in fiction. (Though I get mad that she didn’t know the capital of New York).
Hey, I just misspelled “niece”…and I’m horrible at capitals. I loved the exchange between Calvin and Meg.
Calvin: “Who wrote Boswell’s Life of Johnson?”
Meg: “Oh, Calvin, I’m no good at English…”
Sadly, I think Meg Murry’s awesomeness will be overshadowed by Edward’s sparkly angel face…It’s too bad, because in a mind fight between Meg and Bella, Meg would totally win. Bella would never be able to understand a tesseract.
I don’t hate Edward. Maybe that’s a sign that I need therapy.
activate sparkle! That one had me laughing.
Did you ever finish the twilight series? I am slowly plowing my way through the fourth book now. Throughout the series I could only read about 100 pages at a time before I practically ripped the book apart it was so irritating. Then I found out that the book goes SO f’ing slow that you can skip five pages at a time and still pretty much have missed NOTHING. Maybe that little tip will help you get through the series too.
ps i f’ing hate edward. who the hell thinks a cold, hard stoned body would be attractive or sexy? more like morgue-y. SICK.
why on earth are you reading the fourth book??? the first one is excruciating enough that I shall go no further. someone call Buffy.